Memorializing your loved one with a well-written obituary can be one of the most complicated, emotionally-fulfilling, and intimate steps you take as you prepare to lay them to rest. Obituaries can serve as a notice of the passing, a way to honor their life’s contributions in print, and a physical reminder of their memory later on.
Read on to learn more about obituaries, who writes them, and costs you can expect if you choose to write an obituary for your loved one.
What is An Obituary?
An obituary is, in short, a written ode to one’s life. It narrates a person’s journey and timeline, celebrating their passions, milestones, achievements, and relationships. Once written, obituaries can be shared digitally or in print, enabling family and community members to reminisce and honor the memory of your loved one.
What’s Included In An Obituary?
An obituary has several core elements; including one’s full name, their birthdate, and their place of birth and death. You might also include information about the decedent’s surviving family members, hobbies, or achievements, as well as any service information that you’d like to pass on. If the cause of death feels right to share, you can include that too.
Who Writes Obituaries?
Anyone can write an obituary for a decedent. Typically, those closest to the loved one will discuss and select one person to lead the task. However, if there’s no next of kin available (or if they do not wish to write it themselves), there are several other options to consider. We’ve listed them down below.
1. Family Members
Writing an obituary often falls on a close family member, but it can also fall to an extended family member. This common to see as many find that writing an obituary is a cathartic way to process their grief before the burial.
During an emotionally challenging period, however, gathering thoughts and putting them into words can feel impossible. After all — there’s a delicate balance between celebrating a life well-lived and consoling the fresh wounds of loss. It’s perfectly acceptable for grieving family members to struggle with composing an obituary, choosing instead to employ other supportive family members, friends, or services to help.
2. Close Friends
Entrusting the obituary writing process to a close friend is also common to see, as these individuals often share years of memories and insights with and about your passed on loved one. Their familiarity with the deceased person’s life, personality quirks, and cherished stories can infuse the obituary with an intimacy and genuineness that resonates with every service attendee and reader.
Additionally, having a trusted friend pen the tribute can relieve pressure felt by the grieving family throughout the process. This can be especially true if a family member struggles to find the right words to memorialize their loved one as they grieve.
3. Funeral Directors
Many funeral homes offer professional obituary writing services as part of their funeral arrangements. This service can be particularly useful when family members and friends feel emotionally unprepared for the task.
In this method, a funeral director guides the family through the obituary interview, collecting necessary information about the decedent and their history. They’ll then work to create an obituary based on what was shared, submitting it to the family for review.
Many families prefer this method, as a funeral director can provide a professional, polished result while allowing family members to participate to the extent they feel comfortable.
While there’s usually a fee for this service, outsourcing the obituary can offer immense peace of mind. It frees up the family to focus on emotional healing and logistical tasks that arise after losing a loved one, resulting in a better overall experience for some.
4. Professional Writers
Beyond funeral homes, many professional writers specialize in memorial or obituary writing. They may work independently or with organizations, and they can serve a range of budgetary needs.
These skilled writers approach each assignment with empathy and respect, bringing a keen eye for detail. Their experience in telling compelling life stories translates well to crafting memorable and poignant obituaries.
This option provides a balanced approach to obituary writing, enabling families to be involved in shaping the narrative to the degree they feel comfortable without the weight of finalizing and crafting the obituary.
Collaborating on the Obituary
Obituary writing does not have to be an individualized process. Many families choose to write the obituary collectively, coming together as a group can offer emotional support throughout the process.
Using this method, families can work together to brainstorm cherished memories, share anecdotes, fact-check information, and refine the draft to paint a complete and touching portrait of the loved one.
How Much Does An Obituary Cost?
The average obituary costs between $100 to $800+ on average and as much as $2,000+ for more personalized,longer announcements.
We do want to note that while you can write your loved one’s obituary yourself at no cost, newspapers often charge publication fees. Such costs can vary, often based on word count or photo inclusion. If you plan to publish your obituary in print, you’ll want to call ahead or visit their paper’s website to ensure that you have full visibility into any potential costs.
FAQs
Consider Your Obituary and Service Options With Schoppenhorst, Underwood & Brooks
Ultimately, there are no rules when it comes to who writes obituaries. Flexibility and understanding go a long way toward crafting an impactful, resonant obituary; and an experience for both the loved one and the family members.
At Schoppenhorst, Underwood & Brooks Funeral Home, we understand how difficult and rewarding this step can be. It’s our privilege to guide you through the process and support you, no matter how you choose to create your loved one’s final print memorial. Connect with us today to make arrangements, or for direct support in the event of a family passing. We’re here to help.
